Mother, Daughter and in the Spirit of Holy Women

   The news these past few days has been FULL of amazing women.  I don't think I can truly describe the sentimental love and pride I feel for women who are involved and are willing to stand up for not only their rights, but my rights, your rights and every other women; young, old, middle-aged, rights.  The women who have been out and about and whom you have most likely heard about or read about at this moment are Senator Wendy Davis and Senator Leticia Van de Putte.

  In the past 24 hours, these women have truly inspired me.  I did not know who either of them were until yesterday while I was skimming through my twitter feed when Wendy Davis' named popped up.  I then began watching her filibuster in the Texas Senate.  Senator Davis was opposing a bill that would make it impossible for women over 20 weeks pregnant to get an abortion and would also close down all but 5 abortion clinics in the state.  I already thought that was extremely impressive, any women who is willing to stand up for women's rights in a room that is mostly filled with conservative Texan senators has guts.  I became even more touched by the tweets and other posts on the internet supporting this women.  I don't think I've ever seen so much positive support for a women on the internet EVER.  I was talking to my mom about it and began tearing up.  Imagine being a women in a room where you are (most likely) going to get negative feedback and to have thousands of women and men online saying "Hey, you, thank you, thank you for giving me a voice because I need one." "Thank you for sharing my opinions thank you for making them be heard." It makes it even more touching because Senator Davis literally did nothing but stand up to Texas' Senate for 11 hours STRAIGHT. In Texas Senate, during a filibuster the leader cannot lean on anything, cannot drink, eat or go to the bathroom.  For 11 hours this women stood there and stood up for us, and as a young woman I can proudly say that Wendy Davis is my hero. 

    I was really into the senate filibuster when Senator Leticia Van de Putte came up to the stand and asked the President for a Parliamentary Inquiry numerous times.  I wasn't paying too much attention until she said a sentence that to me, truthfully embodies women fighting for equality.  "At what point does a female senator need to raise her voice to be heard over the male colleagues in the room?" I have watched the video of her saying this and it almost always makes me tear up.  She is so passionate, so powerful.  Women of America, these are the type of women who are fighting for our rights, they go out there and are ready to ask hard questions, they are ready to stand up for what they believe in in a room full of people who disagree with them.  

So, overall, lets stand with these women.  Let's continue to give positive feedback, to stand up and talk about these issues.  Let strong women like Hilary Clinton, Senator Davis, Senator Van de Putte and others like them to inspire you.  Imagine the feeling of having thousands of people saying "Thank you for giving us a voice." and be a part of that group! Because maybe eventually, you will be that person, the politician who inspires young women or the speaker or even the mother. Get informed, get inspired, get involved.  

 THANK YOU WENDY DAVIS, LETICIA VAN DE PUTTE AND ALL THE OTHER STRONG WOMEN WHO ARE GIVING US A VOICE AND INSPIRING YOUNG WOMEN TO GET INVOLVED!  

(Photo Courtesy of Daisy from tumblr her blog is rad so check it out!) 

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Caring Doesn't Have to Mean Sharing; how social networking effects relationships and feminism

I’ve never been a huge fan of PDA.  Don’t get me wrong, hand holding, cheek kissing, and casual arm draping doesn’t bother me in the slightest, in fact I think that all of that stuff is pretty darn cute.  But when those little displays of affection become full on sexual PDA, I don’t really have any patience for it.  When I walk around my school and see couples making out (or what my friends call it “face eating”) on vending machines, under benches and even in the bushes, not only do I feel violated, but I also lose respect for both of the lovebirds.  It’s not a personal thing; I don’t have anything against couples expressing themselves.  It’s more that when I see couples displaying these kinds of PDA, I don’t think that they’re doing it just for the sheer enjoyment.  It almost feels as if it’s a show to demonstrate to everything and everyone how into each other they are. 

When I checked Facebook and saw endless amounts of lovey-dovey posts, a wave of recognition hit me.  Everywhere I clicked were more and more statuses, posts, pictures and other tons of technological mumbo jumbo all about these girl’s significant others, or how they described them, their “boos”, “babies” and even “my life”.  These girls could be songwriters for Taylor Swift guys, that’s how intense the statuses were.  And just like a Taylor Swift song, at first I thought the posts these girls were sharing were pretty cute; “Aw! That’s so sweet!”  But after awhile, I started feeling bad about myself.  Why didn’t someone love me like that? Am I not good enough, pretty enough or smart enough to have someone that into me? What is wrong with me?! I’m not going to lie, for a while I was in a slump and I was totally down on myself.  But then I began to think about it.  Lots of thoughts ran through my head but these two were the most important.

1)    Why do we think that we need to have another person to “complete” us?

2)    If these couples are so happy and content, why do they feel that they must prove to everyone how great they are?

One of my favorite quotations sums up my feelings about this topic perfectly.  “The purpose of a relationship is not to have another who might complete you, but to have another with whom you might share your completeness.” –Neale Donald Walsch.  As young women, we shouldn’t believe that we need another person to complete us.  Not only does this idea support the belief that we are not strong enough or good enough on our own, but it also gives girls and young women the impression that unless they have a boyfriend or girlfriend they aren’t a whole person.  This idea also implies that girls with boyfriends or girlfriends are better then girls who are single.  Naturally, I related this to feminism.  By suggesting that women are incomplete without having a relationship, young women and girls in general, are being told that they aren’t enough on their own. 

Are couples that are constantly talking, tweeting, posting, and woofing* about each other really as content as they seem?  As I looked at the dozen posts cluttering up on my newsfeed, I thought about my ideal relationship.  To me, a relationship is with two people who care about each other and respect each other equally.  The couple should be happy together, but be able to be independent and have their own life outside of the relationship.   As I read the numerous posts, I began to feel like the writers of them were trying to convince me of their undying love towards their “baby-boo”.  If those posts could talk, I imagine they would scream “LOOK AT US! WE ARE SO IN LOVE! REALLY! TELL ME HOW CUTE WE ARE! ACCEPT US! ACCEPT HIM! ACCEPT ME!”  The person who shared it might think that the post was cute and romantic, but when I read it, I felt as if they were begging me to validate their relationship and to accept them, to tell them that they are amazing.  

I eventually decided that sharing isn’t always caring.  These posts supported the idea that as women, we need another person to “complete” us.  These posts also advocate that by sharing the inner most details of their relationship, the couple will get more out of it, feel better about it and that it would mean more because some of their friends liked it.  But I have to disagree with both of these ideas. 

Coming back to my favorite quote, I don’t think a relationship has to be about becoming “complete”.  I believe that when your with the right person, it should be about both of you being blissful, not getting validation on your couple hood.  I believe that my peace of mind and happiness does not rely on another person or one anyone else’s approval. 

I’m not against love, relationships, or affection, guys really and truly.  But I believe that I am a complete person on my own, that all of you are whole and complete on your own as well. I am confident that when we find love or even just a relationship, it should be about both of you being able to appreciate each other’s whole completeness.  Together, both of you will be two wholes, not two halves crushing together trying to prove that they are one, like two puzzle pieces that just don’t quite fit. 

*Woof is a reference to the Office aka the best show ever  

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