Raised on Arizona

Howdy! I'm sick (again) today, and as I was lying in bed, I began thinking about my numerous travels through Arizona and the desert.  My dad lives in New Mexico, on a navajo reservation where he teaches literature.  I've never been to that reservation, but I've spent many hot summer day driving through the desert in an un-airconditioned van.  The trip from LA to New Mexico take about two days, and I've slept in national forests, in VW vans and in Motel Sixes.  I partially hated the trip because it burning hot and dry, but another part of me loved it.  The desert is so gorgeous in such odd ways.  It's so empty and so melancholy and lonely.  I decided that I would make a post about Arizona, my travels, and all the things along the way.

First of all, Neil Young  is always the soundtrack that would play in the van while we drove through the hot sahara winds.  He's songs are beautiful, and when I ever I listen to the music even when I'm in my room in LA, I think of the feeling of sun in my face, hot wind in my hair and a cold soda on my lap.  Another one of my absolute FAVORITE songs by him is...

 

Sun Green! Ugh, guys it SO good.  I love the kind of story it tells, how passionate it is.  I absolutely love the song, and the nostalgia that goes along with it.  I've been listening to his music for as long as I can remember because of my Dad.  It's all really great and somehow all heartbreaking. 

Okay, now that you have the soundtrack on, I'll show you what I see through some pictures I took from this past summer, when we drove on many of the old off roads were mines were and where there were towns where there was only a population of 80. 

A Pueblo in New Mexico on the outskirts of Albuquerque  

On the road somewhere between Nevada and Arizona

A donkey in a town on the old routes

A hawk flying over the desert

Small town on the outside of Arizona at sunset

Building in a small town on the border of Arizona

An old hotel in a railroad town, outside of Arizona

      It's so pretty right? In that way that no one else is there, like it's a completely deserted place.  You can imagine old cowboy shoot downs going on outside of the saloon while a girl in a hoop dress cowers behind shuttered windows.  It's such an ideal place, it feels like nothing changes there.

      I've also been to the Hopi Reservation in New Mexico.  It was really interesting to spend time with people who are so different then me.  I went to a home dance with my dad, who is friends with some of the prominent families on the res.  It was incredibly beautiful and fascinating.  The Hopi men dress as kachinas, the embodiments of spirits.  The Kachina plays a significant role in Hopi culture, religiously and artistically. 

The kachina are embodied in Hopi art. There are Kachina dolls, detailed miniatures of the kachinas made of wood, then painted.  Kachinas also are apparent in Hopi pottery, and other types of Hopi art.  

   Sometimes when I'm looking at photographs on websites, or art that others have made, they remind me of Arizona, New Mexico and the Hopi culture. I'm not sure exactly what about these pieces give me a whiff of that familiar air, but it probably has to do with the colors, the shading and the shapes.  Here are a few pieces that remind of Arizona, even if the artists weren't even remotely inspired by that.  

Photograph by John Zimmerman, found here

Great artwork byAdam Friedman, foundhere

Photograph by Daniel Seung Lee, found here

Anyways, I hope that this post has made you think about the simplicity of dessert beauty.  I know that to me, it's a love hate relationship.  I hate being there but when I look back, and think about the memories I've made on the road, I love it.  It's like it was all just a dream.

    

  

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Inspiration Post #1: David Beauchard

David Beauchard is an artist known for his moving and BEAUTIFUL graphic novel Epileptic, the story of his experiences with his epileptic brother.  In the book, David B. uses visual metaphors, like his brother's disease being a snake like monster.  Not only is the book moving, it is also beautifully crafted. It's done in black and white, and huge huge huge amounts of detail.

A page of David B.'s graphic novel Epileptic

After I read his book, I was really inspired.  I began to draw in just black and white, using shading and lines to add detail.   His art work is simple, yet the more you look the more you see.  At first glance, you see the key aspect of the page but when you look, like really look there is so much detail, so much emotion and beauty in it.  I also really admire his storytelling.  He writes about very personal experiences and you can feel how he feels when you read it.  As a girl who loves writing and art, David B. has inspired me greatly.  I've even started a graphic journal, where I draw about my day, my feelings and everyday activities.  I had always liked comics, when I was younger I read Tintin and Asterix and Obolix, but Epileptic truly changed my views on graphic novels.  I wouldn't call me a graphic novel kind-a-girl.  I usually like books by David Sedaris and Oliver Sax, stuff like that. But Epileptic inspired me greatly, and now I want to just read and look at more graphic novels. More, more, MORE!  

So readers, I highly recommend you google him.  Buy the book, and get inspired to draw, try out new techniques (charcoal, india ink, whatever you like) and to keep on trying!  And here was the first artwork I did after reading David B. 

And I kept on learning, and I'm still forming my own techniques, so go out, read, write, draw, get inspired!

xoxo

egm

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Fantasy World of Mystical, Psychedelic, and Poppy Arts

      None of this is my work, but as I was looking at the images on my computer (because that's what I do when I'm bed ridden.) these all caught my eye.  These images are either from rookiemag.com or http://www.theardorous.com, or http://www.booooooom.com/ which are both such great websites about feminism, photography and just cool stuff in general.  You should definitely check them out. 

     Anyways, back to the pictures.  Lately, I've been very into colorful, mystical kind of stuff.  I think that it's so beautiful and so eye catching.  These images are some of my favorites, the way that the colors blend but still pop and the magical feel they all have.

A painting of the galaxy, I like it because unlike other pictures of space, it's very colorful.  It reminds me of a never ending vertex.

Beautiful Picture from Rookie by Eleanor Hardwick, who's  an amazing photographer, and the collage by Ben Giles  (Here's the full album)

Amazing artwork made out of sugar and plastic.  The artists are Nicole Andrijevic and Tanya Schultz, known as Pip & Pop.  The detail of their work is fantastic.  It's magical and eery, like an anime horror movie.  Think Edward Scissor Hands mixed with Japanese pop art. It's gorgeous, haunting and sickeningly sweet.

This photograph was taken at a the Coney Island Mermaid Parade by Lauren Poor.  I love the colors and the unrealness of it.  The rest of the album can be found here on Rookie.

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Me, Myself, and "You"

All of my crushes have been what some might call “tortured romances”, or what I call them, one-way tortures romances.  I’m a passionate person, and I fall hard. Like really hard.  A lot of girls have crushes, big and small, but I tend to be over the top passionately intensely in a one-way relationship with me, myself, and my picturesque version of the adorable boys I like.

My first crush lasted from second to sixth grade. Yup, I had a four year long crush on my best guy friend.  I don’t really share my feelings, and I kept it to myself, and it was like a tortured, passionate elementary school relationship that I would think over during long spans of time while watching “That’s So Raven” on Disney Channel.  I guess you could say it was pretty serious, I mean if I was thinking about him and our imaginary life while watching my favorite show. 

I know lots of girls who have crushes, some gigantic and some tiny, but I have always been one to go big.  Big in the sense that I have liked my crush for months, even years, pretty, much just a really, really long time.  But I never told them. Ever. Me reveal my deep, dark feelings for a boy? I’d be more likely to travel to Antarctica and live like a penguin for the rest of my life.  I’m a pretty private person; I don’t talk about my feelings with many people.  Especially people who I feel unsure about.  This bittersweet trait of mine has led to lots of heartache. (I say it’s bittersweet because no one ever really gossips about me, since I say nothing. But on the other hand, I don’t say anything, even when I should.) 

Every time I like a boy I usually make them about one thousand times better then they actually are in my head.  I make them my perfect dream, my prince charming. He can cook, is Jewish, smart and sarcastic but not a total jerk. Oh, one small important detail, also in my mind they’re head over heels, completely and totally, passionately in love with me.  This fantasy is safer then actually putting myself out there, telling them how I feel, and putting myself in what I consider a scary position.  I really hate rejection, I get embarrassed easily, and I’m not always comfortable in my own skin, making me not the best person to have a serious heart to heart about my fiery, passionate love for a guy I care about.  I wish I could tell you, dear reader, that these fantasies were satisfying.  That just imagining that the person I care about so much, cares about me just as much is enough.  But I couldn’t lie to you.  It’s not enough, not truly.

I’ve begun to second-guess my passionate imaginary love life.  The guy I like now is fantastic in real life, and I truly adore him.  I’m pretty sure that there are some of you out there who have the same way of handling these “one-sided tortured romances”.   But let me share this thought with you, maybe our passion doesn’t need to be one sided.  Maybe, if we open up, try new things, and put ourselves out there we will get a great, loving, amazing, incredible and most importantly, real, relationship.   I know it’s scary, I’m scared too but I think that it’s worth it.  Of course, this totally won’t stop me from imagining my dream guy, cooking with me while we make sarcastic comments together, but it will take me step closer to turning my fantasy into a lovely reality. 

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All I Do is Jew: How my religion has given me so much more then faith

For as long as I can remember, I have been part of a Jewish community.  I was raised Jewish, attended Jewish school for nine years, and went to a Jewish sleep away camp for eight summers in a row. I loved every minute of these experiences (especially the sleep away camp) but I never felt a strong connection towards Judaism itself.  That all changed after I graduated from my tiny Jewish private school, and moved to a ginormous public high school consisting of five magnets, not even including the normal school. 

My freshman year of high school was the first time I’d ever been with people who were significantly different from me in many ways.  At my old school, everyone was white and Jewish, but at my new school everyone looked differently, dressed differently, and had different views on almost everything.  I was so excited to meet new kinds of people, people who were not exactly the same as me, people who had common interests with me, and having the options to choose my own friends.  Although I was excited, I still craved the small and tight mishpachah (FUN FACT: in Hebrew, mishpachah, means family, thought you’d be curious), I had once had and was accustomed to. This is when I discovered the youth group at my temple, which also happened to be the school I used to attend. 

I know that youth groups can come off as cultish and weird, like those kinds of things that do bible studies for fun or whatever, but I swear, spending time with my youth group is probably one of my FAVORITE things in the world EVER.  I swear I’m not overselling this, it’s one of my favorite places in the world.  At my youth group, I’ve met people who have become my closest confidants, some of the people I’ve met there are now my life long friends who I love with all of my heart.  Joining my youth group has also made me a better person, the kind of person I had strived to be.  It’s made me into a leader, someone who will take charge, speak my opinion, and take chances without worrying about what people would think about me. 

I never believed that my Judaism would define me as a person, but my beliefs have changed.  My Judaism has given me the chance to meet fantastic people, and has turned me into the type of person I want to be, this fantastic change, this amazing community, and the fantastic people I get to see all the time, give me faith in my religion and in myself.

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Caring Doesn't Have to Mean Sharing; how social networking effects relationships and feminism

I’ve never been a huge fan of PDA.  Don’t get me wrong, hand holding, cheek kissing, and casual arm draping doesn’t bother me in the slightest, in fact I think that all of that stuff is pretty darn cute.  But when those little displays of affection become full on sexual PDA, I don’t really have any patience for it.  When I walk around my school and see couples making out (or what my friends call it “face eating”) on vending machines, under benches and even in the bushes, not only do I feel violated, but I also lose respect for both of the lovebirds.  It’s not a personal thing; I don’t have anything against couples expressing themselves.  It’s more that when I see couples displaying these kinds of PDA, I don’t think that they’re doing it just for the sheer enjoyment.  It almost feels as if it’s a show to demonstrate to everything and everyone how into each other they are. 

When I checked Facebook and saw endless amounts of lovey-dovey posts, a wave of recognition hit me.  Everywhere I clicked were more and more statuses, posts, pictures and other tons of technological mumbo jumbo all about these girl’s significant others, or how they described them, their “boos”, “babies” and even “my life”.  These girls could be songwriters for Taylor Swift guys, that’s how intense the statuses were.  And just like a Taylor Swift song, at first I thought the posts these girls were sharing were pretty cute; “Aw! That’s so sweet!”  But after awhile, I started feeling bad about myself.  Why didn’t someone love me like that? Am I not good enough, pretty enough or smart enough to have someone that into me? What is wrong with me?! I’m not going to lie, for a while I was in a slump and I was totally down on myself.  But then I began to think about it.  Lots of thoughts ran through my head but these two were the most important.

1)    Why do we think that we need to have another person to “complete” us?

2)    If these couples are so happy and content, why do they feel that they must prove to everyone how great they are?

One of my favorite quotations sums up my feelings about this topic perfectly.  “The purpose of a relationship is not to have another who might complete you, but to have another with whom you might share your completeness.” –Neale Donald Walsch.  As young women, we shouldn’t believe that we need another person to complete us.  Not only does this idea support the belief that we are not strong enough or good enough on our own, but it also gives girls and young women the impression that unless they have a boyfriend or girlfriend they aren’t a whole person.  This idea also implies that girls with boyfriends or girlfriends are better then girls who are single.  Naturally, I related this to feminism.  By suggesting that women are incomplete without having a relationship, young women and girls in general, are being told that they aren’t enough on their own. 

Are couples that are constantly talking, tweeting, posting, and woofing* about each other really as content as they seem?  As I looked at the dozen posts cluttering up on my newsfeed, I thought about my ideal relationship.  To me, a relationship is with two people who care about each other and respect each other equally.  The couple should be happy together, but be able to be independent and have their own life outside of the relationship.   As I read the numerous posts, I began to feel like the writers of them were trying to convince me of their undying love towards their “baby-boo”.  If those posts could talk, I imagine they would scream “LOOK AT US! WE ARE SO IN LOVE! REALLY! TELL ME HOW CUTE WE ARE! ACCEPT US! ACCEPT HIM! ACCEPT ME!”  The person who shared it might think that the post was cute and romantic, but when I read it, I felt as if they were begging me to validate their relationship and to accept them, to tell them that they are amazing.  

I eventually decided that sharing isn’t always caring.  These posts supported the idea that as women, we need another person to “complete” us.  These posts also advocate that by sharing the inner most details of their relationship, the couple will get more out of it, feel better about it and that it would mean more because some of their friends liked it.  But I have to disagree with both of these ideas. 

Coming back to my favorite quote, I don’t think a relationship has to be about becoming “complete”.  I believe that when your with the right person, it should be about both of you being blissful, not getting validation on your couple hood.  I believe that my peace of mind and happiness does not rely on another person or one anyone else’s approval. 

I’m not against love, relationships, or affection, guys really and truly.  But I believe that I am a complete person on my own, that all of you are whole and complete on your own as well. I am confident that when we find love or even just a relationship, it should be about both of you being able to appreciate each other’s whole completeness.  Together, both of you will be two wholes, not two halves crushing together trying to prove that they are one, like two puzzle pieces that just don’t quite fit. 

*Woof is a reference to the Office aka the best show ever  

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